Transcript:
Everyone, welcome back to another podcast. Welcome to Soulish Femme, my name is Glennavelle Manarang. To those of you who are new here for the very first time, welcome! So today’s topic is about narcissism again because apparently this is a hot topic for people to usually like to listen. It is about escaping from narcissistic abusive people. So you thought?
The same spirit, different faces. You know what happened, that we all encounter the same spirit because we do not wrestle against blood and flesh. These are demonic people embodied by Satan. They have the flesh, but they’re actually don’t have the spirit of God. And it’s actually been my realization that you are going to encounter them whether you like it or not.
There are two kinds of people in the world only two. The wicked and the righteous. The light versus the darkness.
These are the people of God versus satanic. So do not be surprised that even though you have escaped from your last abusive relationship and then you probably encountered one at work or one of your friends, maybe your family members or you married into one.
And the sad part about narcissistic people are like dead men walking. You know them by their fruit.
That’s what Jesus say. How do they how do they actually live their life? Nothing seems to matter to them except the same old same old pattern. It’s like a groundhog day. They have no ambitions. They have addictions. They have excuses.
They have the mindset of a victim, the woe is me. And they will always use that against you. They will not take accountability.
They will always try to be the victim of the circumstance and then instead of changing their ways, they’re going to blame it on somebody else’s because it’s rather easy to do that. And that is why there’s so many stories in the Bible about narcissistic people. Even though it’s not labeled as narcissism or narcissistic, but we can see it from Abel and Cain. The very first person who committed a crime was Cain because of his jealousy.
And narcissistic people are full of jealousy, envious because why? They’re the Satan himself. He’s a father of all the prideful spirits. Satan, the demonic spirit. They like attention. o these people actually in Galatians 5:16-25 it says, “But I say to you, walk by the spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the spirit and the desires of the spirit are against the flesh. For these are opposed to each other to keep you from doing the things you want to do.”
But if you are led by the spirit, when he talks about the spirit, he’s talking about the Holy Spirit. You are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident. So there is the difference between walking in the holy spirit of God versus the narcissistic spirit.”
So the difference between a narcissistic spirit or walking in the flesh are these sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, so on and so forth.
So, you can tell from the get-go that when you’re dealing with narcissistic people, one, they only love you not because they truly love you. Physical or sex is not love. Okay, that’s just sex. People are kids under 18 years old. Parental guidance is advice.
But that is why many people think when they are married to someone they thought oh my gosh we’re getting you know in love and this is so emotionally bonded together. Or so attached but then that’s just physical but he is not really actually there mentally emotionally. He’s just going to show up whenever he feels like it gives you breadcrumbs and then once there’s a conflict he disappears or he’s going to stonewall you because that’s actually one of the classic move of narcissistic people.
And every time you question them, they think it’s always going to be about them. And so it’s very frustrating to have a conversation when they have not developed fully in their brain
So one of the things that I see when you’re involved with someone that is actually have not yet properly developed in their mindset of how to communicate like an adult.
For them it’s always like an argument or an attack or are they going to say why do you always blame me for everything? It’s always my fault.
Glennavelle
It seems as though you’re always trying to blame it on me even though you are actually never said that. They just assume things because it actually says here they are jealousy. They’re fit of anger. Do you see this? When you are dealing with people that are narcissistic in the spirit, they are have enmity, the strife, jealousy, divisions and dissensions. That’s what Jesus said.
Ways to determine you are dealing with narcs
They they’re actually coward. One person against the whole mob of them. This is why they gang up on you and that makes them powerful. But when really when it comes to shove, they have no backbone to come face to face and have a confrontation with you because why these people have no depth.
They have no substance. They’re actually not fully developed in their strength. They only are barking too loudly. Like they will have this cockiness and they project this confident confidently aura.
1. Narcs will take something from you.
Remember what Jesus said? The thief comes in to steal, to kill, and destroy. And so these are not something that is physical. As I said, narcissistic people are not something to be cured. These are spiritual warfare. These are the people that have been influenced by Satan.
Another sign that it is so hard to deal with narcissistic people is because they are actually so good because they have they have flying monkeys around them. They come in groups. They come in packs because they are very strong in groups because as I said they have no backbone.
Actually, do not be fooled because that’s actually nothing but a facade. When you have encountered many of the narcissistic people, they only want to provoke you, poke you, and try to see whether or not you’re going to stoop down to their level because that is the bait that they want for you, to be just like them.
2. They cannot communicate
And so the moment you are going to have a conversation with people who have not fully developed mentally and they have no emotionally intelligence, you are going to be met with someone that your conversation is going nowhere. You are going to be frustrated and you’re just going to just tell yourself what is the whole point?
Emotional Intelligence Example: Because when Jesus encountered, remember with the Bible, when the woman was dragged in front of him, this is the classic story that I would like to illustrate to you, excuse me, that Jesus was dealing with a narcissistic because when he was being set up by this narcissistic man in the church, this woman was dragged in front of him, remember?
And he was told according to the law of Moses that when a woman or a man was caught in adultery, they would be cast a stone and then they would be killed by the stone because that’s exactly what the punishment was in the Old Testament.
And so Jesus actually decided to stoop down and ignored them. Ignored completely what they were doing. They wanted them to get riled up. They wanted Jesus to be like them who are going to be impulsive. And so we know that when we’re wrestling with this kind of people, they want you to be like them. So the thing about narcissistic people to get a sidetracked is that if they are coming against you and if they cannot ruin your life, they will try to turn you like them. Okay?
3. They wanted you to become just like them.
So if they’re deceiving you become if you are if you are deceived they want you to become a deceiver. If you have been my gosh they can’t they cannot let me you know talk they don’t want me to talk I have all of this stupid coughing in Jesus name I rebuke you Satan. So anyway they want you to become a liar like them. They want you to become a drama queen like them. They want you to become manipulative like them.
So if they cannot break you, they want to make you just like them. So one of the realizations I had when you’re dealing with narcissistic people is they want you to become just like them. As I said, if you’ve been lied to, they want you to become a liar themselves. If you have been abused from other people, they want you to become an abuser because that’s exactly what the devil wants to continue the lineage of abuse.
Another sign that you’re dealing with narcissistic people is that your hunger for God somehow it becomes really cold. They decided that you stop going to church. They’re going to let tell you that you know going to church is useless. Stop reading your Bible and praying. you start you started dwindling and falling away from the truth of God. This is why Satan wants to isolate you so much and he wants to make sure to question whether or not the Bible is true. Maybe the Bible has been changed so many times. So maybe it’s not really reliable, blah blah blah.
And so you cannot see that according to Ephesians 6:12. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers, the darkness of this age, against spiritual host of wickedness in the heavenly places. There it is.
We wrestle against not in flesh
So this is what I said that narcissistic people are not just human, but they’re actually been indwelt, embodied by Satan himself. and their Lord, their God is of this world, Satan, Lucifer, whoever you want to call him, the beast, the serpent from the very beginning. And so this is why when we are trying to escape from the abusive relationships and we ended up with another abusive, it is because it’s like when Jesus said the spirit leaves and then they come back again and they bring seven more wicked with them.
Remember the time when Jesus was saying that the house was clean, the body was clean. Because if the devil has not done the work for you, maybe he tried to attack you when you were kids. Well, he did attack me based on my story. He used my dad and my family to ruin my innocence and to actually take everything that I’ve got when I was young. And so if he cannot take you out physically or mentally, emotionally, what does he do? He brings more demonic people with him. And if you would thought that you have escaped from your abusive family and then you thought, “Oh my gosh, finally I’m free.”
Many are called but few are chosen
And then little did you know that you ended up with another abusive relationship like another narcissistic as if you are a target of Satan from the very beginning. And do you know what happens? Because you have the mark of God in you. If Satan does not see you as a threat, he would just leave you alone. He’s not going to be threatened by you. But because Jesus said, “Many are called but few are chosen.” Satan knows who you are. If he knew that you have a mark and God have chosen you, he will make sure to come and follow you wherever you go. He’s going to make sure of that to ruin your life, to ruin your faith.
What happened to Moses? Remember what happened to Moses? He was almost getting rid of and even Jesus. That’s why Jesus when Mary and Joseph was awakened by the angel and says leave this house or leave this place because Herod is trying to get rid of the babies. And so that’s exactly what happens if you are actually are called to do God’s will. People are being used to try to sabotage your life, question you, gaslight you and ruined your very essence. And that’s exactly what happened.
So Jesus would say to you that this is not something to do with you physically but it’s a spiritual matter.
We are actually convinced in this world that the devil is not real. If I were the devil, I would say the same thing. We live in the 21st century. It is the most advanced technologically. But many people are convinced that the devil is not alive and he’s actually just, you know, pigment of imagination. He couldn’t be possibly real because of all the technology that we’re actually trying to do. But why is it that no matter how advanced we are technologically, no one can fix the wicked heart? No one can stop you from doing the things that are bad.
The issue of the heart
Why is that? Why is it that people cannot fix wickedness or they couldn’t fix the things that are prideful or bitterness or resentment and greed? Why is it that there’s no such app to get rid of that? Because the only person or a spirit that can fix your heart, a prideful heart is God himself. And God said, I resist the proud and give grace to the humble. This is why when we encounter narcissistic in our lives and we are close to God. I’m not saying that I’m saint or I have all together because God know I have my sin too. I struggle with sin like cursing a lot or anger problem sometimes or impatience.
But when but at least you try, right? At least you are admitting that you you are nothing or nobody without God. Okay, there’s a difference between a Christian is that a Christian will not justify their bad behavior. They will repent and they will do the best that they can to do the best that they can not to sin again. However, the narcissistic people, they do not have that kind of mindset. They will not take accountability. They will not even admit that they have fault on their own. They even going to blame you for the things that they’re doing wrong in their lives. That is the diabolical version of that.
It is a demonic spirit
This is why when you see people in your life who are not really of God, they will just say everybody does it. You know, it’s fine. I don’t care if I hurt your feelings. You know, you started it and you brought this on yourself. The kind of language that these people use is really diabolical because God doesn’t condemn people and gaslight you and shame you, but the devil does. He shame us. He gaslighted us when you fall into sin. I remembered when I came when I went to college when I decided rather to join this Bible study I was getting invited to and I was becoming a first you know Christian now mind you I was Catholic then.
But I was not really into spirituality I was not reading the Bible and the moment I was reading the Bible and I started going to church but because I fell into sin I was doing sexual immorality and I was you know doing things that I shouldn’t been doing. Guess what the Bible what guess what Satan did say? Look at you. You try to be a good person and you try to read the Bible and you try to go to church. Don’t worry about it. You’re going to fall back into sin again. And so the kind of gaslighting that Satan will use is the same thing as gaslighting as a people who just like look at you, you know, who the hell do you think you are for doing this or reading your Bible, going to church, the same exact dialogue.
It is an ongoing battle
So do not be surprised when the moment you do something that is right like breaking an addiction. The moment you try to break off an addiction, you will have the kind of attack and he will remind you. Remember the time when you used to be so funny, when you used to be so fun then and you were conniving and drinking and getting drunk and partying all night and then look at you now, you’re so boring. And so that is why sometimes we think that it’s our own thoughts when actually it’s the life from the pit of hell.
And so one of the things that I would like for you to understand is escaping from narcissistic abusive relationship is very hard. It is not that people cannot escape it because it is actually a supernatural way. It’s help from God. The only reason why I was able to escape from the narcissistic abuse because I asked God for help. I remembered when I was laying on that living room in my old apartment when I was single, I made a bargain with God. I said to him that if you would help me get out of this prison and this abusive relationship, I promise that I will serve you for the rest of my life.
And because of my desperation, I had to really made a bargain with God at that time because of I was really felt like I was suffocating in that relationship. I couldn’t get out. It was so difficult for me to get out because that’s what Satan does. He imprisons you. He doesn’t want you to have the freedom. But Jesus said, “I have come that you may have uh you might have life and have it more abundant.” So this is why Jesus said, “I have come that you may have life and have it abundantly.” But Satan imprisons us and he wants us to be in bondage and he wants us to remain in bondage.
Pray for a breakthrough
So because of my desperation that I pray the plea of prayer that God if you will somehow get me out of this abusive narcissistic relationship that I don’t want to be in I promise you that I will serve you for the rest of my life. And this is why I will not take that promise lightly. And every time I try to walk away from God and run away from him I am reminded by that promise. It’s like remember the time when you made a promise on that apartment of yours when you’re so desperate to leave your relationship because you wanted out and for some reason God had gradually eliminated my likings or my passion for this man.
For some reason God had changed the way that I look at him and I can see it clearly for who he really was. And so what happens when you are given the spirit of discernment? The the spirit of discernment is a gift from the Holy Spirit. It is discernment is knowing and seeing things that people don’t understand why you see the things that you see. It’s like reading between the lines. It’s something to do with reading people not just based on the words but based on what they say and how they say it and their body language. I’m not sure if you can hear all these noises. Let me pause for one second. Well, somebody’s showering.
Example stories in the bible
So, I’m just going to continue on. And of course, it’s all right. So, as I said that there are many stories in the Bible. One of them is Cain and Abel. And then another one is Nabal and Abigail. If you heard that story about Nabal who married to Abigail and Abigail somehow decided to just did not obey the husband. Of course, he didn’t know that that time and actually saved her life at the same time when David was trying to ask from Nabal’s household for giving them something to eat with his soldiers with him because David said, you know, here we are. We did not steal from your from your flock, from your stock.
We could have but actually we protected it and when it comes that we needed something you actually turned around and says we’re not going to give you because Nabal was a prick. He was a boastful narcissistic man who was very egoistic. So not only that we also see that Joseph remember Joseph who was sold into slavery because again jealousy. So the theme of the the thing about narcissistic people are prideful. They’re jealous of you. They’re egoistic and they’re actually envious of what you have. And so that’s why Jesus said, “You have the light.” When you carry the light of God, narcissistic people are drawn to you like a moth into a flame because you carry such a light that when you encounter with them, they can recognize something is different about this person.
Lack of accountability
And instead of trying to understand what you carry and how did you get that light, what do they do? They will try to dim it. They will try to diminish it and squeeze you like a effing bug. Okay. So, we’ll not try to curse here because of course we’re trying to be friendly in this podcast. And I don’t know, for some reason lately I’ve been trying to stop from cursing as if Satan is reminding me to start cursing again. I’m not sure being controlled. Who the hell knows? But besides the point is that this is not new. Okay? This narcissistic topic is in the Bible.
We just never had terms for them before. They just never labeled it as that. But they do exist. This is why it’s important that we cannot just be ignorant of the ways of the enemy. This is why we have to be aware, alert, and be knowledgeable that even though we’re living in the 21st century, we are still dealing with the same demonic spirit. Because spirits, they do not die. Ladies and gentlemen, the spirit goes on and they continue and they hop from one person to another person.
This is why Mary Magdalene had seven demons in her and Jesus had to cast them out. And remember the person who was also living in the cemetery, this man was also out of his mind. We thought he was out of his mind, but Jesus casted him out. And when Jesus asked him the question, what is your name? He said, I’m a legion. Meaning to say, there are plenty of them residing in one body. Let me get
